Life with Anxiety


Anxiety, we either talk about it or we don't. We think it's panic attacks and break downs, however, there is so much more to it. There are things people do in an every day setting that is a showcase of anxiety. People that have anxiety can experience these things. 

So, here are some things that people with anxiety face with every day. 

Phone calls are so annoying, because the moment they ring, our minds run with questions and worry. We reject the calls because it is easier than answering them. 

Text messages and Facebook messages are like a game of war. It's waiting for the sudden reply because we reply fast, but we get no response for maybe 1 minute, or 1 hour or even 5 days, and guess what the worry kicks in. It's the questions like "what have I done", "Did I annoy them", "Are they ok". It's like 1 hour could be like a month for us. We check our phones every minute incase we missed the reply. Most of all, we hate messgaing again to check in because we haven't heard back from them. 


It's second guessing our choices and decisions, that when we are faced with making a decision, we stress out. It's being put on the spot and freaking out inside, or it's having to be a leader in a situation or a job, that requires us to be the center of attention or be the voice of something. It freaks us out. It's constantly thinking our work isn't good enough because things need changing and then we question ourselves "Am I good enough?" It's the thought of speaking in front of a crowd that makes the heart beat fast and the palms sweat. It's biting the nails, or the inside of our gums when we are in a situation that is making us nervous, or in a crowded room where our thoughts have to scream because it's so noisy and all that we can do is stare off into space. It's the same with events, we get invited to things, but yet there is a part of us that want's to reject it because it involves a crowd of people. Or it's not being invited to something yet everyone else is, that makes us question ourselves. "Why don't they like me?", "What did I do wrong?", "Why didn't they invite me?". Our minds are always full of questions and worry. 

It's becoming anxious when everyone is singing happy birthday to you in a big crowded place that we have no idea what to do but smile, but deep down we are screaming because we don't want attention. As a matter of fact, we hate attention. We walk around with our heads down so we don't make eye contact with anyone. It's not knowing how to respond to compliments. It's stuttering over our words because our mouths are trying to keep up with our fast paced minds. 

Sometimes, it's lying awake at night or even being woken up by our own thoughts, so we are always tired because we are tormented by our own minds. It's sometimes ensuring we have sound going on when we are sleeping, like music or a fan and it's even having some sort of light on, not because we are afraid of the dark, it's just comfort. 


Sometimes, music is something that can calm us. Whether listening to music while we sleep, or listening to music while we work so we can focus better. Sometimes it's listening to music that can silence the mind for just a moment. 

So when we say, sorry I don't really want to go out today, don't take offense to it. It's only because we aren't up for being in a crowd of people. When we say, we need a day to ourselves, don't message us just for the day, things can wait. When we are silent, don't ask us what is wrong, just make us feel comfortable in that situation. If we reject your call, don't expect us to call you back. Just message us if you can. We respond fast most times. 

You see anxiety isn't just panic attacks or break downs. It's all the little things too. Most of all, if you have anxiety, you are not alone! People care and are there for you. If you think you have anxiety, go see your local GP and find out. It may cause you to be more anxious, but answers are good. There are also support companies that are there for you like Beyond Blue. 

If you read this far, good. Just know this one thing: YOU ARE STRONG. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. 


Can't Control


In life, there are things we can’t control. We can’t control where we are born, what people think of us, people’s actions about us, the weather or even traffic! 

See we will be faced every day with things we can’t control and there is nothing we can do about it. However, there are also things we can control. We can control what we eat, we can control who we hang out with, we can control what clothes we wear, we can control what plans we make. You see there are things we can and cannot control in life. 

When I was planning this shoot, I didn’t know how it would turn out or even if it would work. I couldn’t control the sparklers, or the streamers or which way the bubbles went, but I could control how I was going to shoot the images, or I could control where we would stand or how I would want my model to stand during this shoot. I could control something, but I couldn’t control other things. I could have gotten frustrated or annoyed because of the wind or the bubbles or the lighter, but I could control how I acted. Calm, collected, inspired. 


You see we face things we can’t control but we have the ability to control how we act. 

Another situation: I was with a model driving to our location, and we hit a road block: 2 hrs of traffic. A track went up in flames that morning and we were stuck in traffic for 2 long hours. I could have gotten mad or frustrated and taking it out on the model or the people around me, or I could have acted calm, make the situation more fun which I did. We got to our location 2 hours later and we created some amazing images. 

How we respond to situations will determine our actions, emotions and even affect those around us. We can either lighten the mood by playing music and having fun or getting angry and ruining everyone’s day. 

We can control our breath, we can control how we look, we can control how we act around others, we can control our attitude, our speech, our actions. We can control so many things, but there are things we can’t control. 

We can’t control the weather. We can’t control how people act towards us. We can’t control night or day. We can’t control traffic, or where we are born, what our name is, what people think about us. There are loads of things we just can’t control, but we can control what we can. 

Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react. There are some things we just can’t control and some things that do happen to us that we can’t take back, but how you deal with
It afterward is our future… - Katie Piper

In life, we simply can’t control everything. We can simply control how we react to things.


"We can’t control everything that happens to us in our life, but we can control how we respond and act to the things we can’t control. "


"Don’t worry about what you can’t control. Our focus and energy needs to be on the things we CAN control - attitude, effort, focus. These things are what we CAN control" - Tim Tebow

Death To Chains Album Story

Death to chains is not just an album or a ministry; it's a war cry in my opinion. Meet Curvine Brewington, your mum’s favorite rapper. September 30th, 2016, this album is released.

Death to Chains is a hip-hop-infused, live cinematic production birthed out of the vision of Curvine, and his wife Candace to fight human trafficking through music and art. Initially,
Death to Chains was meant to be a simple concept album, spotlighting the issue of slavery by narrating the life of a young girl named Hope, who finds herself  entangled in the web of slavery. However, after much creative development, Curvine and his team of students began dreaming bigger and believing God for better and thus began story boarding to create a short-film that would visually accompany the album.

When most thought this presentation could get no better, Curvine and his team kept on pushing the bounds of creativity. Taking this marriage of hip hop and film, they layered it with the thought-provoking spoken word, contemporary dance, and live acting to create a visually-stunning "experience" that convicts the heart and challenges the soul to take a stand against injustice.

The Death to Chains project has toured all across America, its purpose being to spread awareness about the injustice of human trafficking and also raise funds for safe houses and rehabilitation homes in both America and in Romania. Curvine says “This past spring we saw over 553 people give their lives to the Lord from this project and we raised $8,000 for 2 safe-homes”

Death To Chains, tells the story of a girl named Hope who had moved to a Los Angeles in order to pursue her dream career as a professional dancer. However, being turned down by the company after company, she finds herself in a desperate situation, barely surviving on a minimum wage salary. Suddenly, like a gift from God, the man of her dreams comes to sweep all her troubles away. Unfortunately, this prince charming ends up being the very man who seduces her and throws her into a world of slavery.

This project isn’t just an album, it’s an album that has created impact and awareness for Human Sex Trafficking and not only that, has convicted many hearts and has seen many come to know Christ. I believe that this project is going to release revival to not just America, but every nation and bring this issue to light and expose the truth. As a generation, we have gotten silent about issues like these. 

 Martin Luther King Jr says “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter most”.

I couldn’t agree more with this statement. We sit back and simply say “oh, someone else can do something about it”. When really, every single one of us can make a change. We can end human sex trafficking. It may not be easy, but if we band together for once cause, we can see it come to an end.
This is why I believe in what Curvine and His wife along with the team of students are doing. I don’t share things like these unless I believe in it and the cause. The songs on this album aren’t just songs, they are truth filled songs that carry an important message to those that listen to it. Every person that ends up in the sex trade, is a sister or brother, a friend, a daughter or son. These people have the right to live yet their lives are being stripped away because of this.

 There is a line in "Freedom Arise" that I love which is "Let God be revealed. Let Freedom Arise. Let the broken be healed" It is the time that freedom arises, God is revealed in our lives, and the broken brought back home. I also love the songs "Find my heart and X.O.S.O.S" because to me, they both link. Both talk about how this girl has had rejection after rejection, then a man comes along, captures her heart, but in the end, this man abuses and uses her. She is trapped in this trade. Does anyone want to help? It starts with the guy capturing her heart but ends in only hurt and pain and slavery.

Curvine says on one of his Instagram posts
"I believe for a long time, victims of human trafficking as well as other injustices have gone unnoticed by so many. These individuals have become a faceless people group – a statistic, a number, or a theme for a blockbuster film. But we often forget that these are PEOPLE. They are somebody's sister, somebody's mother, they are sons and daughters – eternal beings, created by God and loved by God. But even amidst the travesty of slavery and injustice, I know that there is still beauty locked inside the hearts of these individuals. I Believe they were placed here for a reason, and for THIS reason – and I DON'T believe their purpose for existence is to live a life full of bondage and pain. Christ Died to eradicate the chains of sin. It's time that we RISE UP AND LIVE to eradicate the chains of injustice."
 I stand with Curvine and His team and believe that every being placed here on earth, was created with a life full of purpose, not to be in bondage and pain, but to live life to the fullness.

The scripture Jeremiah 29.11 says “For I know the plans I have for you declares the lord, plans to give you a hope and a future. Plans not to harm you, but to prosper you”,  And in John 10.10 it says “The enemy only comes to STEAL, KILL and DESTROY, but the Lord, comes to GIVE LIFE and LIFE to the FULLNESS”, and that is exactly what the enemy is doing. He is stealing, killing and destroying these precious lives and us a generation are sitting here just waiting for someone else to do something about these things. We can be the generation that stands up for truth and brings freedom to these precious ones.

It is Curvine’s and his team It is our desire for this project not only awaken the public, but to also challenge them to take action about this issue, whether that be through prayer, financial support, volunteering, or simply being vocal and helping raise more awareness.
Proceeds from tour dates will go directly to freedom-based initiatives who rescue and rehabilitate women and boys who have been trapped in the sex trade. For resources and more information on how to get active in the fight against injustice, please visit their partners Project 42 and Freedom House.

Curvine and his team are believing God to raise over $100,000 upon the release of this project between now and the first 2 quarters of 2017. You can help, by purchasing this album on September 30th to bring awareness, financially give, prayer, and even be a voice to help bring light to this issue.

As a photographer and blogger, my mission statement is even “Tell stories, show love, show beauty and capture moments”, and this is why I believe in what Curvine and Candace and his team are doing. So I stand with them to bring awareness and to end slavery.

Will you be a part of a generation that brings an end to slavery and injustice?

let's be the voice for the voiceless.

death to chains album review

Visit his website for more information


Curvine says ;This past spring we saw over 553 people give their lives to the Lord from this project and we raised $8,000 for 2 safe-homes
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter most.
death to chains album review
They are somebody’s sister, somebody’s mother, they are sons and daughters – eternal beings, created by God and loved by God.